Pie of the Month

Keeping up with the recent trend of frequent pies, on the 20th November our resident American Emily whipped up a couple of pumpkin tarts.  With some difficulty, apparently.

Filling Ingredients

1 1/2 c sugar
1 tsp salt
2 tsp ground cinnamon
1 tsp ground ginger
1/2 tsp ground cloves
4 eggs
2 15oz cans 425g tins pumpkin
2 14oz cans 410g tins evaporated milk
2 unbaked pie shells

Filling Preparation

1. Agree to serve pumpkin pie at the office the Monday before American Thanksgiving.
2. Remember that tinned pumpkin is hard to come by in England. Phone sister and send her to specialty shop in Milton Keynes to obtain pumpkin at six times the American price. Retrieve pumpkin (and evaporated milk) from sister.
3. Back in tiny apartment flat on Sunday night, confirm cupboards contain all necessary dry ingredients.
4. Head ten minutes east to local franchise of ubiquitous convenience grocery chain to pick up eggs. Search majority of store with no luck till you remember eggs aren’t refrigerated in England. Find eggs on end of bread aisle.
5. While in shop, look for ready-made crust. To no surprise, fail to find it. Resign yourself to making it from scratch. Assume this means flour–which you have at home–and butter–which you need to get. Pick up some butter.
6. Wait in ridiculously long line queue for unmotivated blue-shirted employee to become available to ring up your £2 purchase. Realize Realise that before you left home, you emptied the pocket containing a dozen £1 coins since they were weighing you down. Use debit card instead.

Crust Pastry Ingredients

2 c all-purposeplain flour
1/4 tsp salt
2/3 c butter
4-5 tbsp cold water

Pastry Preparation

1. Back at home, start taking out pastry equipment. Realise your pie plates tins are in storage in the States. Decide cake tins, which you do have, aren’t good enough. Head out to Oxford Street department stores.
2. Wander John Lewis for the better part of an hour searching for pie tins. Note that despite your obvious bewilderment, not a single employee asks to help. Nor do they look like they could help if you asked. Grow despondent, abandon hope and start looking for substitutes. Wonder what the hell a sandwich tin is and vow never to use one. Give in at last and buy two rather expensive but still lovely French porcelain fluted tart tins that at least are generally the right size and shape. Go home.
3. Start taking out pastry ingredients. Note that the flour you’ve got isn’t all-purpose flour. Do a Google search to find out what the equivalent is. Learn that while you can usually get away with substituting one flour for another, under absolutely no circumstances should you use the kind of flour you currently possess to make pastry. Curse aloud.
4. Head out again, to same ubiquitous grocery chain again, but for a change of scenery, go to the one ten minutes to the west instead. Find plain flour (next to the eggs) and pick up a dozen other items since you’re there. Note the uncanny skill with which all cashiers put the six heaviest items in one flimsy bag, and the six lightest in another. Stop just outside the door to rebalance bags.
5. At home again, return to taking out pastry equipment. Realise your rolling pin is in storage in the States. Search flat for suitably shaped and weighted substitute. Eye armagnac and scotch bottles but find they’re already open. Scan wine rack and select a nice Chilean Cabernet.
6. Back in the kitchen, realise your mixing bowls are in storage in the States. Choose an Ikea saucepot instead.
7. Remove the price stickers from your new pie tins and give them a quick wash in the kitchen sink. As you rinse the second one, drop it such that it shatters into eight pieces. Begin invoking gods you don’t yet believe in.
8. Decide to use cake tins after all. Confirm that both cake tins won’t fit into the tiny oven at the same time, thus doubling baking time.

Assembling the Pie

1. Combine flour and salt for the pastry in a large bowl saucepot. Cut in butter till the mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Using a fork, stir in enough water just to moisten the flour.
2. Divide dough in half. Shape each half into a slightly flattened ball. Refrigerate for at least an hour.
3. On a lightly floured surface, roll out one ball of dough to a 12-inch circle. Fold the dough into quarters and transfer it to the pie tin cake tin. Unfold it and crimp or flute the edges.
4. Mix the dry ingredients for the filling in a small bowl. Beat eggs in a large bowl freshly washed saucepot; then stir in the pumpkin and dry mixture. Gradually stir in the evaporated milk.
5. Pour the filling mixture into the pastry shells. Bake at 425 F 220 C for 15 min. Reduce temp to 350 F 175 C and bake for 40-50 min or until a knife inserted near the center centre of the pie comes out clean. Cool Commute before serving.